Amanda writes from the perspective of someone with an invisible disability - fibromyalgia.
It was very familiar, i responded with:
One of my friends, who knows a bit about my mental state, has a habit of saying – ‘you look good today!’ Or, ‘you’re looking better, healthier, thinner!’
Among other things I have a near crippling eating disorder, so how he thinks telling me i look thinner is in any way a helpful statement is beyond me.
I hate it. I know he means well, but in reality it’s just selfish – he doesn’t want to deal with me being depressed or crazy, so he says ‘you look better!’ to distance himself from it.And what am I supposed to say?
‘Actually I’m one step above cowering in a corner today so I’m out having a crack at enjoying myself?’
And what am I supposed to do? Not try to look, feel and act better? Isn’t that what you want me to do? Isn’t that the answer to all my problems? Am I supposed to cry and scream at all times like I feel like doing, do you not want me to wear my mask/ I thought you didn’t want to deal with this?